Weekend Reflection

Friday was brutal. It started well and ended horribly. When one aches, we all ache. Saturday we all felt a little bruised and beaten -- and we held each other with gentleness.

It is these moments when I am so deeply grateful for the teamwork our little family employs. It is all grace. I am grateful for how we truly love each other -- and how each of us knows we are deeply loved.

I am grateful that our home is a haven -- even though it is small and sometimes messy.

I am thankful for friends who listen and pray.

I am sad for those who do not know the kind of love that we share. The love that Jesus so clearly taught us -- our Source for loving each other.

Day 2: Jon Bowers

Today, my friend, Jon Bowers, is in a Cincinnati hospital starting some seriously intense chemotherapy for kidney cancer that has spread beyond his kidneys. In fact, right now, he is experiencing treatment 2 of 14 for the week. So, as I lift up my friend, Jon, to Jesus and ask for healing and strength, I will tell you just a little bit about him.

I met Jon's wife Nancy through the North American Christian Convention. I started working there as an intern in the summer of 1993. Nancy immediately introduced me to Jon and their three boys, Nathan, Zachary and Andrew. (I think Andrew was all of about 5 at the time, which seriously ages me as he is now married with little ones of his own. Oh my....) And, the entire Bowers family welcomed me into the their home for food (very important in my young life at the time), long walks, parental advice and sibling fun. From day one whether I was joining them for some family fun or being scolded for messing up Nancy's vaccuum marks, I was one of the family. 

Jon is an extremely hardworker. A systems analyst for Procter and Gamble, it seemed that Jon would stop working long enough to hang with the family, help the boys with homework -- and as soon as the family went to bed, he was working the rest of the night. I remember Nancy telling me that Jon would be up til the wee hours of the morning, before catching a few hours of sleep and starting all over again. As I find myself with a daughter myself, I think of him often as I have adopted some of his non-sleeping habits. But, when Jon wasn't spending time with his family or working for P&G, he was donating his time to the North American staff, supporting their IT efforts any way possible. 

Supporting IT efforts for the North American was no small task. The early 90s brought in windows technology, but the convention office was DOS-based. Yep. You heard me. DOS. Based. The man has a heart of gold and a work ethic like no one I know -- and he showed it every day at the North American HQ.

He also gives countless hours to the church and ministry. Jon truly loves God and God's people. When I lived in Cincinnati, I remember that he worked tirelessly as an elder offering the leadership the church desperately needed. You could see and hear the passion in his joy and frustration with trying to help the church move forward.

That same passion he surely shares with his family. One of the traits I admire most about Jon is that he has always had high expectations of his kids, but he loves and protects them fiercely. I was the happy recipient of the same "kid treatment" from Jon, even though he isn't nearly old enough to be my dad. He always was ready with some words of wisdom. But, when I got into some stressful situations at the North American he (along with Nancy) were quick to come to my defense.

I haven't talked to the boys in a really long time, but one look at Jon and you can see and hear his deep love for them. I had lunch with Nancy and Jon a few years ago, when I was still living in Florida. They have wintered in Florida for the last several years, and one Sunday they drove over to Orlando. As we were eating, we shared some of the joys and sorrows that the last 15+ years had brought. Just watching Jon share about his kids was delightful. It was fun to see the pride in his eyes.

And, now, several years later, Jon and Nancy have the most beautiful grandchildren. Each one is so fortunate to inherit all of this love and joy and passion for God and His church, and fierce protection over their lives. I certainly am blessed to know Jon and Nancy, and call them family (even though I don't call like I should)!

Today and for the next several days and weeks and months to come, I am praying for my friend, Jon Bowers. I hope you will too. I can't wait to see how God will use this day and every day to count for His glory because of the faith and love and strength that He created in Jon.



742 words, 45 minutes.

3 gifts funny

1. Funny how I am looking for funny gifts, on a day that has been nothing short of challenging and exhausting. Thankful for always having reasons to be thankful.
2. Booty shaking in the front yard that embarrasses my family. Thankful for a booty to shake and a family to embarrass. :)
3. My niece, Hannah, trying to convince me to tell her what we bought for Grace's (her sister's) birthday present. Funny that she thinks I will believe her when she says she "won't tell". :) Thankful to share a laugh on the phone.

3 gifts moving

1. Car full of family moving toward waterpark fun.
2. Heart moving toward peace.
3. Body moving toward health.

This Too Shall Pass

"This too shall pass..." I can still hear Amy Grant's voice ringing in my ears as I traveled to Florida in 2008. I was listening to her audiobook Mosaic as I headed on a month long escape/adventure. I cried over the reflection of what had passed in my life. The good and the bad. It is always comforting to know the bad will pass, yet we mourn the loss of the good.
My dad said it to me the other day -- "this too shall pass" -- as we were discussing an issue that was grating on me. I instantly remembered Amy's voice and reminded myself not to wish life away. It is just so short. Embrace the bad with the good. In a short time it will pass.
This week I learned of a dear friend with kidney cancer. Shortly after hearing the news, one of my best high school friends announced the death of her father. I wanted to shout at life, "Wait! Stop! Slow down! How can this be happening? I need more time!"
I watched Charlotte run off with her friends in indirectly supervised boundaries. She would return for a check-in and a quick hug, then flitter away on her scooter. She is growing up so fast. "Wait. Stop. Slow down! How can this be happening? I need more time!"
Time is passing, indeed. The weeks move so quickly I find myself speaking in terms of months not days or hours. I certainly feel the tug of intentionality to value the moment.

40 years

On the occasion of my 40th birthday, June 29, it is fitting to reflect on where I have been and where I am. Since it is now August, and I have perspective of that "terrible" (wink wink) day, I should publish this unfinished musing.

As you may or may not know, after eating healthy, working out five times a week and not losing weight, I hired a nutritionist in January. On top of the lack of changes externally, I was exhausted, achy and not sleeping well. Sounds like old age, right? That's what I thought too. But, it turns out there is a cure for messed up hormones and some effects of the aging process (at least there are ways to make getting older easier)! Doc Sage Campione helped me identify the issues and work toward getting healthy.

I also had a goal of being pregnant by my 40th birthday. My whole life I have wanted to have kids and raise a family. Doc Sage is on it! She has been super encouraging. I have been eating like a rockstar. My hormones are balancing. The supplements are helping me feel better. For the first time in my life my body actually has the capacity to have a child.

What I didn't tell Doc Sage is that I made a deal with myself after my divorce that if I didn't get pregnant by 40, I was done. It would be fine. But, that time in my life would pass and it was a good cut off point emotionally -- it wasn't meant to be.

So, on the occasion of my 40th birthday, I STRUGGLED. I mean really struggled with getting older. Right at the time I had opportunity to have a family, my time was up. I had set this arbitrary timeline to help me deal with the emotion of not having a family, when in fact it set off a completely different set of emotions surrounding fairness and timelines and numbers.

Silly, right? Right. But, the drama was worth the full circular understanding that everything is alright. God is still in control. He still has a plan for me. He still loves me beyond measure. He has blessed me beyond understanding. And, children or not, He always gives me what is best for ME. ...What is best for me..... The very best. And, He has the amazing ability to give me the best and at the same time give the best to my loves -- because He loves them, too. And, so, again I rest in His amazing grace.

3 Gifts Found Around a Table

1.) Playing "Would you rather?" with my family.
2.) Trying new foods and getting to know likes and dislikes.
3.) Praying together.

3 Gifts Bent, Beautiful, Loved

1.) Bent over from laughter with my husband.
2.) The relationship my parents have is beautiful. Thankful they still enjoy one another's company after 45 years.
3.) I am daily humbled at being deeply loved despite my tremendous shortcomings.

3 Gifts In Your Dad

Really? Just three from this Daddy's Girl?? Does Voskamp have any idea how absolutely amazing my dad is? :)

Here is the thing about my dad, he just loves me. That's the gift. Every interaction he has with me exudes love. He accepts me just the way I am. He gives unrelentingly. He loves unconditionally. He totally gets me. He loves spending time with me. He is gentle when I am brash. He speaks truth to me when I am not thinking straight. He is a rock when life is upside down. He loves Jesus with all of his heart. And, even when we don't see eye-to-eye, he doesn't take it personally, he just encourages me to figure it out.

And his love doesn't stop with me. He genuinely loves Mark and Charlotte. He always asks about them. He embraces them openly. He is engaged and intune with their lives, even from a distance.

When it comes to Dad's I really got the best one. I mean, I know lots of people think their dads are the best. But, mine really is. If there was a superbowl of dads, mine would win year after year.

I could give detailed stories, but there aren't enough pages in the world to cover it all. And, by the time I was done, there would be nothing but a puddle of gratitude tears left of me.

I don't deserve the dad I have. But, I am exceedingly grateful for the grace that made him mine.

Cheri Lyn Novak

It's been a little while since my last post. And, let me just say a LOT has happened! I mean, a LOT has happened! I have a new name! I married Mark Novak, Jr. on December 20, 2011. If you recognize his name, that's because I featured him in a post about family. Apparently, Char knew before we did.

Now, I have added to my amazing family a husband, a daughter and more aunts, uncles and cousins than you can shake a stick at. The ceremony was a quiet one at home. Then, we celebrated this summer with a vow renewal ceremony along Lake Michigan and a tented party in the back of our humble home. It was so fun!

 Char had a great time getting to know her new cousins, Hannah and Grace. She got to meet Aunt Cheli and Grandmommy and Papa. Getting to know each other takes time, but the girls had it figured out in no time.

I purchased a home in Whitefish Bay after Mark and I started dating. We have stripped it down and remodeled it to make our two-bedroom, 1950's saltbox into a home for three.

 Oh, and I have a new job, too. Well, I have had a few jobs since I left Sears. But, I am now happily working for Home Depot, while I take on some sales training jobs on the side.

 As you can see, God continues to dump blessings on me. I know he is dumping blessings on you, too, even if we have to look for them sometimes.

My Dad Rocks

I love this from my Dad yesterday. "I have my daughter back. My wife has her daughter back. My daughter has her sister back. Her friends have their friend back. And, no, I won't pray for that to change."