Watching "How Do I Look" the other day (yes, I watch way too much tv), I saw a woman who was stuck in "fantasyland attire". Literally. She's a kindergarten teacher, who thinks it's perfectly acceptable to dress like a 5-year-old in princess outfits, and outlandish clothes -- the kind I pulled out of the toybox when I was a toddler to play dress up.
As this woman became aware of her fashion shortcomings, the hostess asked how she was feeling. She insightfully remarked, "I am being revealed."
Wow. While I was horrified by her lack of good fashion sense, I relate to her perfectly. I may not literally wear it "on my sleeve" but I have covered up who God is in me with emotional and spiritual "fantasyland" attire designed by who I think I should be -- not who I am. Nonetheless, God out of his deep love for me, has gently begun His revelation in me.
This morning, I went to church. While that may seem ordinary for some, for me, lately, that is new. The pastor is starting a series on the book of Revelation. (Funny, how I feel led to go to a church I've been dragging my heels to attend -- and the sermon comes at me with pinpoint accuracy.) I couldn't help but think that while the author, John, is revealing Christ to me. I am also being revealed. As I am tested. As trials come. As I confess my sins. As I allow Christ to become more central in my life, I become more aware of my shortcomings and the truth about me becomes more apparent.
I am naked. My heart is insipid and cold -- black as night. I cling desperately to the revelation of my God -- that it is only because of Him that I am whole. It is only by His grace that I heal. It is only because of His grace that I hope. He is everything -- the first and the last -- the One who was and is and is to come. I am nothing without Him.